You may read the title of this article and have some questions. I totally understand, and I am happy to answer those questions.
Your first question might be… “Donnie, how in the world have you had a girlfriend for 39 years when you have only been alive for 39 years?” Well, this girlfriend of mine has been there for my entire life. I was just a baby, but apparently I had no choice in the matter of who my girlfriend would be. I have to admit, I was a really good-looking baby, so maybe I was just irresistible to all of the ladies. (I can feel all of the eye rolls.)
This all sounds crazy, and you are probably still wondering what the heck I’m talking about. Don’t worry — keep reading, because it will all make sense soon.
Another question you may ask is… “Donnie, you are married to Michelle but still have a girlfriend? How is she okay with that?” To answer that question… yes, Michelle is totally cool with it, and the funny thing is that she loves this girlfriend of mine just as much as I do. My girlfriend was at our wedding, and I made sure I got a photo with her as she was dressed to the nines. Michelle was also in the photo with my girlfriend and me.
Your last question might be, “Who is this amazing woman that you have been in a relationship with for literally your entire life, and what is her name?”
Her name is Blanche Farber. She was my next-door neighbor and was the sweetest person I have ever met. She was best friends with my grandmother Connie, who lived across the street from us.
You are probably thinking, “Why did you call her your girlfriend?” I brought a high school girlfriend home for dinner, and Blanche happened to be outside of her house when we pulled up. I introduced my girlfriend to Blanche, and she said, “I’m guessing Donnie didn’t tell you about me, his real girlfriend. We’ve been together for a while now.”
From then on, it became our thing. We were boyfriend and girlfriend.
They always talk about “the girl next door,” and she was it for me. I was introduced to her at a very young age as “Aunt Blanche,” but we had zero blood relation.
Aunt Blanche was married to a man named Hyman “Red” Farber. I knew him as “Uncle Red,” and full disclosure, I was afraid of this man. There wasn’t a fence to separate our two yards, so I would find myself on his lawn. Oops!
Whether it was playing catch with my brother and Georgie telling me to “go long,” or me wanting to hide behind his car during a serious manhunt session, Uncle Red wasn’t a big fan of people being on his lawn. My mother used to say that I was Dennis the Menace and he was Mr. Wilson because we had many stare-downs — me on his lawn and him in his rocking chair, staring at me through his window.
Aunt Blanche and Uncle Red had three grandkids — Craig, Justin, and Gavin — and they became family. We did everything together in our connected yards. If any of those three were with me, Uncle Red would not be as upset that I was on his lawn. If any of those guys come up in conversation, I refer to them as my cousins.
These neighbors weren’t just your regular neighbors to me.
Aunt Blanche had two children of her own, Robbie and Gail. Just to let you know how close my family was with this family — Gail was chosen as my mother’s maid of honor in my parents’ wedding. Robbie was basically my mom’s brother, with them always bickering about just about anything. It was pure love between these two families.
Back to my girlfriend of 39 years…
Aunt Blanche — a.k.a. my girlfriend — passed away this past August at 100 years old. To say she lived a great life is an understatement.
I will miss my girlfriend, but I’m so glad that we were probably the best-looking couple of all time.
ILY.
Donnie Black was born and grew up in Ewing Township. He currently works at radio station XTU in Philadelphia as a producer, on air personality and promotions director.
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