Thousands of cars whiz by the slender spire rising over the Route 1 entrance ramp at Alexander Road every day. Many more zoom past while driving on Canal Pointe Boulevard on the back way to MarketFair. And when West Windsor Township recently assembled a group of 15 different churches and religious organizations to form an “Interfaith Community Bridge” as part of its Human Relations Council, the township overlooked it as well.
I’m talking about the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints — more commonly known as Mormon — in West Windsor. The religion of Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney has received much scrutiny in this contentious election year. But many people in West Windsor and Plainsboro have been unaware of the church’s presence. Despite living in this community for 15 years, I never knew that West Windsor was home to an LDS church. And yet there it is, tucked away on Canal Pointe Boulevard in West Windsor, indeed, practically hidden, behind the large office complex that houses the WPST radio station.
It is a sizable building, a gathering place for three separate congregations, including one that is Spanish-speaking. It is also busy all week long as a community gathering place for Boy Scouts, other youth groups, women’s organizations, and the like.
Once you overcome the challenge of finding it, you discover a group of warm-hearted church citizens who believe fervently in service and volunteerism and are eager to be part of the community.
“We are constantly encouraging other people to come whenever they like. That’s the whole point of sending missionaries out — we want people to try out our ideas and beliefs. Everyone is welcome,” explains Kathy Bybee, a West Windsor resident who holds the newly created position of public affairs representative for her congregation after serving in many other positions, including as a youth leader and teacher. “We expect there are a lot of different ways we could contribute to the community as an organization. Our goal is to build partnerships with others who are in the business of good deeds, and my job is to figure out ways to do that.”
So that I can get an understanding of her church from different perspectives, not only hers; she brings along to our interview Karey Dearden, a member of the church leadership, and Sanja Dimic, who is the only one of the three not born and raised in the religion.
Dearden explains that churches are organized into local units called wards or branches. Their unit at 901 Canal Pointe Boulevard houses the Princeton first ward, Princeton second ward, and the Princeton third branch, with a combined membership just short of 1,000. For his ward, Dearden serves as first counselor to bishop Paul Alkema, who leads this unit.
Dearden was born in Henefer, Utah, a tiny community of 500 people located 45 miles east of Salt Lake City. His father was a salesman; his mother was a homemaker. Dearden was the oldest of four children raised devoutly going to church every week. After graduating from the local high school, Dearden studied accounting at Brigham Young University, graduating in 1986. He does international tax work for Ernst and Young with a specialization in the insurance industry. His work took him to Houston and Bermuda before bringing him and his family to West Windsor in 1999, where they live near Mercer County Park.
His wife Lori is a homemaker who grew up in Kansas City, Missouri, and first learned about the church from a high school friend. She was intrigued enough to turn down a full scholarship to the University of Missouri and let Brigham Young University know she was interested but would need financial help. “BYU gave her a full scholarship and I met her at a dance in college,” says Dearden.
Together, they have raised all three of their children in the church tradition of service. Brady graduated from WW-P High School South in 2003. After his sophomore year at West Point, he spent two years in missionary service in Germany and then returned to West Point, before graduating number one in his class in 2009. He is currently serving the U.S. Army as a Black Hawk helicopter pilot in Fort Campbell, Kentucky. Brooke graduated from South in 2006, and then also went to West Point. After his sophomore year, he spent two years doing missionary work in Thailand, before returning to West Point where he graduated this past May. He is now in Australia, earning his masters in political economy. Daughter Brittain is a senior at South, and will attend Brigham Young University in Utah next year where she will play soccer.
Bybee, the oldest of seven children, was born in Logan, Utah, and like Dearden, also grew up in the church. Her father was a teacher and her mother was a homemaker, who had converted to the church. From sixth grade on, she lived in a suburb of Salt Lake City. She came east to study psychology at Harvard University, from which she graduated in 1978. She returned to Salt Lake City where she worked two years for a church-owned publishing company, and then became a radio news reporter. But then she enrolled at Yale’s School of Organization and Management, earning an MBA in 1982.
She met her husband, a bond analyst, on a business trip. He is not a member of the church, and before they were married, they had to work out a number of issues regarding family. “In the church, it is believed that families can be together through eternity, so it’s encouraged for people to marry within the faith,” says Bybee. “He was an atheist when I met him, and before we were married, it took us five years to figure out how we were going to raise our children. Our sons are now 17 and 14 and both decided on their own to be members of the LDS church. Our daughter is 12, and not at a point where we are pushing the issues but she goes to a Presbyterian church on alternate Sundays when she is not here.” The family lives in the Princeton Chase neighborhood of West Windsor.
Sanja Dimic lives in the Penns Neck area of West Windsor. She was born in Bosnia, but grew up in Michigan. Her husband, David Westbrook, is from South Africa and the church was an important part of his upbringing. So, too, was volunteerism and community service, strong tenets of the church, which Westbrook puts into practice as the director of recreational soccer for the West Windsor Plainsboro Soccer Association.
“I made it clear to him that I believed in God, but not in organized religion. It took five years of marriage and two kids before I joined,” says Dimic.
She and her husband have four children, 17, 15, 12, and 10, and all are home-schooled. I asked Dimic what finally tipped her from being a non-believer into becoming one of the church’s most dedicated members.
She says it was when her oldest son was two or three years old, attending church nursery school, and she became interested in finding out what he was learning. “As a mom I appreciate anyone who is going to teach my kids about morals,” she says. “I listened and discovered I didn’t disagree with what was being taught, so from that point I was open to listening to the missionary discussions about whether I would join the church or not.”
I ask what are the most common misconceptions about their religion that bother them most. They tell me the first misconception is in its name — the preferred name is not the Mormon Church, but the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
“The Book of Mormon is a piece of scripture that we use. Mormon is not offensive, but it’s inaccurate,” explains Bybee. “I prefer to tell people that I’m a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, or LDS, more commonly known as Mormon. Another big misconception is that we don’t believe in Christ, but we do and it’s in the very name of our church.”
Another big misconception is that women do not hold positions of authority within the church.
Dimic, who is president of the relief society, dispels that idea. “Our females give talks on the stands during the service. We work hand-in-hand with the leadership. It is not that we simply do what we’re told to do; we work together. There is a true partnership between the husband and wife in a relationship, and our influence on our families is much more important than what is in the secular world.”
Another misconception: that Latter-day Saints worship Joseph Smith or other prophets.
“We see Smith as a human being who had a role to play in the history of the church,” explains Dearden. “We see Smith or the current prophet, Thomas Monson, as similar to the prophets of the Old Testament, who were leaders of people.”
What about the misconception-as perpetuated in such television series as “Big Love” about a man with many wives –– that Mormons still practice polygamy.
It turns out that the Church officially disavowed polygamy in 1890 and currently excommunicates any Latter-day Saint who practices it. “While there may be some people who practice polygamy, it is not allowed in our church,” says Dearden emphatically. “They may be members of an offshoot or splinter group or something completely different.”
A recent documentary stated that the temple in Utah, known as the Salt Lake Tabernacle, would not allow non-Mormons to be inside. Bybee responds: “While the church is a place to connect weekly with our spiritual selves, it is also busy and noisy and very social. The temple is set aside as a sacred space to contemplate where we fit in the universe and allow us to recommit ourselves to God. It wouldn’t make sense to open it to the general public, because that would undermine its nature as a special place of quiet reflection.”
Bybee further explains that the Salt Lake Tabernacle, where the world-famous Mormon Tabernacle Choir got its name, is basically a historical building that is open to the public.
As for the 500-pound elephant in the room, the Republican presidential candidate in this election year, Bybee explains that the church is officially and scrupulously neutral and doesn’t support Mitt Romney any more than it supports Harry Reid, who is also a Mormon. Bybee adds that she has tremendous personal respect for Romney, who, while building his career at Bain Capital, also served as an LDS bishop (equivalent to a pastor) and was a stake president presiding over several area congregations near Boston.
“These are positions that involved tremendous responsibility and time commitment. I’ve only see the best people called for those positions,” she says.
Dimic chimes in: “Not everybody who strives for those positions get them. Romney is a person who desires to serve. This is what I feel this country needs. The fact that he thinks this way makes me admire him. He is doing what he believes is right, and he’s not doing it for the glory or the power.”
Dearden says that the perception that Romney is out of touch with the American people is incorrect. “As a bishop, he has worked with people with the worst problems. He understands people with needs, heartache, and hurt and he will take what he learned in the church and apply it on a national basis to help Americans become self-sufficient and not dependent. Those are great concepts to apply to this country.”
#b#Interfaith Bridge#/b#
While some communities may be engrossed in political divisions during this election season, West Windsor is pursuing a theme of “working together” as a new community group with representation of different faiths in West Windsor has been established by Mayor Shing-Fu Hsueh. The “Interfaith Community Bridge” (or ICB for short) has been formed as an outgrowth of the Human Relations Council to build positive relationships and share information on resources and programs available to the community.
“It has been a dream of mine to develop stronger relationships within our community. I want to ensure that we are carefully listening to our leaders in the faith community to understand the challenges and opportunities our residents face,” said Hsueh.
The ICB to date consists of faith leaders from approximately 15 different faith communities. Participants represent Chabad of the Windsors, Congregation Beth Chaim, St. David the King Church, the First Presbyterian Church of Dutch Neck, the Muslim American Society, NextGen Church, Prince of Peace Lutheran Church, Princeton Baptist Church of Penns Neck, Princeton Korean Community Church, Princeton Presbyterian Church, Straight Way Baptist Church, Windsor Chapel, and the Institute of Islamic Studies.
As for groups not yet represented in the ICB such as Mormons, Hindus, Buddhists, Sikhs, and others, Hsueh says “hopefully whoever does not know about the ICB will contact me [at 609-799-2400] or other participants. It is an open group.”
Hsueh also encourages those who are not members of any religion to participate. “We are still looking to be more inclusive. Definitely all groups coming up will be welcomed, but we also want them to understand the goals and objectives that we originally established. So far I have not heard that anybody objecting to the goals,” Hsueh said.
Jenny Lee, a West Windsor resident and student at the Princeton Theological Seminary, is the facilitator.
— Rikki N. Massand
