So my husband George is retiring after 29+ years at his job. Let me just say that there is no one on this planet who deserves a nice, relaxing, peaceful and stress-free retirement more than George does, for several reasons: 1) he worked two jobs for over 30 years, up until about two years ago; 2) his job has been stressful for the past few years; and 3) he’s married to me, which I hear is stressful in itself.
George does not plan on working anywhere for a while. He plans on enjoying his retirement and throwing out his alarm clock.
I urged him to retire. I wanted him to enjoy life without job-related stress. I wanted him to have a good night’s sleep without worrying about the next workday. Let’s face it, friends. Time doesn’t wait. You gotta enjoy while you can.
Recently however, I began to think about the wonderful possibilities that George’s retirement presented.
First off, George is not afraid to do housework. He has done the grocery shopping for years; mainly because I am terrible at it and I end up spending hundreds of dollars and filling two shopping carts (I have a coupon for cat food! Yes! Inconsequential that we do not have a cat).
He cleans, he does laundry, he cooks, he does yard work. No, ladies, he is not available. So I visualized carefree weekends for me, doing crafts, lying around eating bon-bons, because all the chores would be done during the week.
Then I started to think about all the stuff we need done around the house. Added to George’s list of talents is home repair and remodeling (to an extent, but that’s a whole other column. Perhaps a novel).
The possibilities are endless! So I have compiled a comprehensive Honey-Do List for George, as follows:
1) Power-wash the house.
2) Wash the windows.
3) Maybe put sod down in the front and back yards. That would be nice.
4) Put fresh mulch down, but only after raking out all the gardens and edging them.
5) Plant the planters with the flowers that you have bought with the list I provided you.
6) Paint the living room.
7) Rip down walls and ceiling in our bedroom, put up new sheetrock and paint. Maybe a skylight? Hey, and French doors leading out to… keep reading.
8) Break up our old concrete patio out back and install some lovely pavers. Perhaps a water feature.
9) Create an open living concept from our kitchen and living room. Oh, yeah, and a fireplace would be perfect.
10) Replace paneling in sunporch.
11) Replace carpet in sunporch.
12) Our laundry room needs a makeover. I’ll let you be creative on that one.
13) Build me a separate structure in the backyard for my crafts. Must be heated, cooled and have running water and electricity and preferably a hot tub, and a combination lock on the door.
14) Mojo (our dog) would like to have his own space. Nothing huge, just enough room for a queen-sized bed, a flat-screen TV so he can watch his game shows, and a refrigerator that he can open himself.
This can be next door to my craft house in the yard but it will need a covered walkway from the main house. He hates getting wet.
I’m not sure what George will do in his second week of retirement, but I’ll think of something.
Wait. I forgot something. George, I’m gonna need you to go ahead and have dinner ready for when I get home from a long day at the office. And oh, by the way, I’m not talking fast food or sandwiches. The breadwinner needs nourishment, after all.
In all seriousness, I am so happy for my husband and so proud of what he has accomplished in his career. As I said, no one deserves retirement more than my hubby.
I look forward to seeing him relaxed and happy and tanned from his frequent beach days this summer. While I work. In my office. Not on the beach.
Hmmmm. Not cool. But at least the chores will be done.
Happy retirement, George!
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