Members of the Grover family, residents, and township officials gathered at the Grover Farmstead under blue skies on a mild Veteran’s Day morning November 11 to dedicate the Thomas R. Grover memorial, the culmination of a divisive debate over the property’s preservation.
Thomas Roy Grover, Specialist Four, U.S. Army, was killed in action in Vietnam on February 2, 1969, at the age of 22. Grover was mortally wounded as he left his position to support two squad members under fire. He received a silver star and two purple hearts. Tom’s brothers, Ted and Robin, both spoke at the ceremony.
“We owe a debt to all of you veterans today. We were given the benefits of life. The veterans give back much more,” said Robin, as he thanked the West Windsor community and its schools for all they have given him growing up on the family farm.
The unveiling of the memorial concludes a contentious issue revolving around the demolition of the farmhouse, where the Grover brothers grew up. The 90-acre farm is considered a major symbol of West Windsor’s agricultural heritage and it was purchased by the township in 1994 for $3.26 million. The farmstead’s subsequent preservation has led to further open space preservation efforts.
The 170-year-old farmhouse was occupied until 2009, when Florence Grover, the family matriarch, moved out following her husband Pete’s death, and the rights to the house were turned over to the township.
Afterwards the house fell into disrepair and was demolished in December following a 3-2 council vote in July, 2013, amidst opposition from residents who sought to preserve the farmhouse. As part of the resolution to demolish the farmhouse, a memorial for Thomas Grover was to be built.
The memorial is located right off Village Road East, marked by a flagpole and a white sign reading “Grover Farm” in red lettering. A jetty rock that had been in the township’s possession was chosen for its triangular flat face, in consultation with the plaque manufacturer. The bronze plaque commemorates Tom Grover and ends with a Biblical verse from John 15:13: “Greater love hath no man than this: that a man lay down his life for his friends.”
Ted Grover still lives on the edge of the farm site with his wife, Janice, who is a retired Dutch Neck Elementary School teacher. Ted is the president of Educational Services Group at 15 Roszel Road in West Windsor. He and Janice have two daughters, Emily, a physician in Boston, and Amanda, a third grade teacher in Virginia.
Speaking before the attendees, at one point Ted’s voice strained with emotion as he read his brother’s military commendation.
Tom’s death “was very difficult to deal with for a while,” Ted said after the ceremony. “Probably for a year or so. Meeting Janice made a big difference.”
Ted was stationed at Fort Dix and was due to be sent abroad when he received news of his brother’s death. Tom had three weeks of duty left, Ted says.
“It is important to learn that people have responsibilities in life, that you can’t run away from your obligations,” Ted says. “Having something there for him is important. He had a major impact on us.”
The Grover family had two sons drafted by the army. The third son, Robin, was five years younger than Ted and did not serve in the military. He currently lives in Alexandria, Virginia, working as a trade attorney and licensed customs broker.
“The brothers grew up in West Windsor and despite my being away, it’s still home,” says Robin, who moved away in 1975. “It was a wonderful educational system back then and it still is. I’m grateful for the township and the taxpayers.”
Their mother Florence, 92, was unable to attend. Father LeRoy C. “Pete” Grover Jr. died in 2008.
Pete and Florence grew potatoes on the farm but switched to strawberries, pumpkins, corn, asparagus, and tomatoes in the 1970s. The farm was one of the first in the area to invite families to pick fruits and vegetables.
“I knew Tom’s father for 50 years. I talked to Pete all the time, he taught me how to grow things,” said Bob Cox, the commander of American Legion Post 76 who gave the ceremony’s keynote speech. “We used to come over with my kids and grandkids to pick vegetables. This ceremony is significant for me. I served in the same war, in the Air Force.”
Post 76 chaplain Wes Holman, who also grew up in West Windsor and served on aircraft carrier USS Leyte, and Post 76 member George Goeke, of Hillsborough, were also in attendance.
A sense of indignation still remains in relation to the demolition of the farmhouse several hundred feet from the memorial. The farmhouse demolition took place last December, after being delayed for more than a year and a half as volunteer members of the Grover Farmstead Restoration Committee sought to preserve the house.
When reached by phone, John Church, a member of the committee and the principal editor of the comprehensive 93-page committee report advocating for the farmhouse’s preservation, said he had no further comment.
“I’m going to leave this one alone, I’ve said everything I needed to say,” Church said.
Committee vice-chair Pete Weale blames the township administration for a lack of disclosure over the demolition plans and subsequent investigations regarding the house’s condition.
“The Grover Homestead should have been the Tommy Grover legacy, not some silly rock,” Weale wrote in an E-mail. Weale himself had located a larger rock at the Trap Rock Quarry in Kingston and offered to buy it himself if the township would transport it.
When called for comment, Ted Grover said his family took over the farm in the early 1900s. “The farm house was a historic site and we set up a committee and felt it should have been preserved. There wasn’t really support from the historical society to preserve the house, which didn’t make any sense. It was the most pristine farm and farm building within the township. It dated back to the early 1800s. But the house, after my mother moved out, nothing was done to maintain it. After three years, it was decided to be torn down rather than saved.”
