I do not like to cook. I am not very creative, imaginative or patient. So I usually jump at the chance to NOT cook. Imagine, then, the irony of me spending the better part of a beautifully sunny, low-humidity Sunday in the kitchen, preparing meals for my dog. Yes, my dog.
Mojo, our 9-year-old Yorkie, recently went on a hunger strike. Here’s Mojo’s eating history – when we rescued him, he was being fed dry dog food with a little wet dog food on top. He refused to eat that for us. We finally found a dog food that he deigned to eat, after trying about six different brands.
Unfortunately, the dog food had something in it (maybe Red Bull or Maxwell House Dark Roast?) that caused Mojo to become highly hyperactive. We hired a trainer for a brief span of time (one visit) and she suggested that we feed him a mixture of oatmeal, veggies and raw beef. Mojo loved it and almost immediately became more relaxed.
So Mojo has been dining on the oatmeal mixture for six years, with slight variations every now and then. Out of the blue, he decided that six years is too long to be eating that slop, and he refused to eat it. We tried everything short of calling Omaha Steaks and ordering him filet mignon. I got on the internet and researched healthy and appealing homemade dog food.
I went to Shop-Rite, manned with a lengthy list. I bought a steak, chicken, turkey, beef liver, chicken liver, beef broth, chicken broth, veggies, pasta and rice. For $40. For the dog. Nothing in my cart for us.
George was out doing yard work, the sun was shining, said dog was lounging in the sun on the patio. And I was manning the Gourmet Dog Food Kitchen. I had all four burners and the oven going, making beef stew with broth, pasta, veggies and the steak, chicken stew with broth, rice, veggies, chicken and a dash of cheese, baked beef liver, baked chicken liver, and turkey stew with broth, pasta, veggies, and boneless turkey. I was sweating, stirring and muttering the entire time:
“WHY can’t we just pour dry dog food in a bowl and serve, just like every other dog-owning family in America? How did we raise a gourmand dog?”
“If that mutt doesn’t eat this stuff, I’m heating it up for our dinner.”
“$40? Really?”
I bagged all this doggy deliciousness in individual zip-seal baggies and froze them, keeping a few out for meals that day and the next. Mealtime comes around. I selected the beef stew, thinking, “What dog doesn’t love beef?” Answer: Mojo.
He sniffed it, did a little head shake as if to get the rank odor of fresh, tender beef cooked in broth and simmered with mixed veggies and acini di pepe (little noodle balls) out of his nose, and walked away. George picked up the bowl and called Mojo back.
George then proceeded to sit on the floor and show Mojo how good the meal was by eating it. The man was eating out of the dog’s dish, all the while crooning, “Mmmmm. This is DELICIOUS, Mo! Look at Daddy! Daddy LOVES this. Try it.”
Mojo watched George with interest (and smugness, I am sure) eat almost half of his beef stew. Gotta love a man, sweaty from yard work, sitting cross-legged on our porch with a dog bowl up to his mouth, eating the food with his hands. I was tense with frustration and exhaustion at this point. George got disgusted (and full) and left to shower.
I grabbed a baggie of beef liver, poured it on top of the beef stew and offered it to Mojo. I felt like I was re-enacting that old Life Cereal commercial. SUCCESS!! I yelled, “He likes it! Hey, Mojo!”
Nowadays you can find me at the stove, baking potatoes for Mo, steaming green beans (Mojo prefers them to mixed veggies) and making dog food.
Unfortunately for my family, I am so tired of cooking that we have been dining on a lot of hot dogs and pizza lately. But the dog is well-fed!
Ilene Black has been a resident of Ewing for most of her life and lives across the street from her childhood home. She and her husband, George, have two sons, Georgie, 32, and Donnie, 28. A licensed soccer coach, Black was head of the boys’ travel soccer program in Ewing for many years and ran the township’s annual Labor Day Soccer Tournament for several years. She is the creator and moderator of a Facebook group called, “You Know You’re a Ewingite When…,” which has more than 1,000 members.
