I did not expect to see two of my classmates’ senior portraits posted on numerous news channels and websites in connection with the tragedy at Rutgers.
I was especially shocked to see the names under these now nationally known people: Dharun Ravi lives a few minutes from me. We rode the bus together before most people started driving to school as seniors. Molly Wei was in my chemistry class sophomore year, and she was also in my P.E. class. I saw them often in class and out of class because they live so close to me.
While I can’t say exactly what transpired between the roommates at Rutgers, I can say that during my interactions with Ravi and Wei at High School North there was no incident that would lead me to believe that either of them would intend to do so much harm to anyone. Neither showed any signs of homophobia or any participation in bullying. Dharun and Molly made their decisions based on bad judgment, and their choices led to an unforeseeable tragedy that has shaken everyone in the community and people all over the nation.
I cannot say what motivated my friends to do what they did, but, as an alumna of West Windsor Plainsboro High School North, I can say that our high school does take measures to prevent an incident like this from happening.
West Windsor-Plainsboro, as a district, takes various efforts to promote equality and to stop bullying — in and out of school. I clearly remember assemblies during middle school where police officers came in to address cyber bullying and cyber safety. This assembly was presented first to students during school and then to parents on Back to School Night.
In eighth grade, students attend the “Mykee” assembly (named after Michaal Fowlin, an actor and psychologist whose presentation aims to “create an atmosphere of worldwide inclusion, not just tolerance, towards all people” (www.michaelfowlin.com). In this assembly Fowlin and other presenters use performance to instill the ideas of tolerance and equality in their audience. Every year students leave this assembly in tears, obviously moved by what they have seen. When these students leave the middle school and come to the high school, they bring with them these ideas of kindness to others and tolerance with them.
From freshman to senior year, High School North continues to teach lessons of acceptance to its students. Mandatory health classes discuss tolerance for all groups of people and, again, discuss the consequences of bullying and how to prevent it. The one health lesson that I remember most was during freshman year. That day my class discussed the racial, ethnic, and sexual slurs that we had heard in school. My teacher invited any students who had been addressed with one of these phrases or who felt they had been discriminated against in another way to share their experiences.
I remember nearly crying in this class as students stood to explain their situations. From looking at the faces of my classmates, I knew that everyone would leave this class more conscious of what they said to and how they treated others.
In addition to these classes, both high schools in the district host Gay Straight Alliances (GSA) where all students are invited to learn, share, and find acceptance. These groups host various events during the year to promote awareness and acceptance.
These activities include National Day of Silence, Ally Week, and the annual Read-In where various gay, bisexual, lesbian, and transgender (GBLT) issues are addressed.
Efforts are made by administrators, teachers, and students to promote these important concepts. What makes the difference is each person’s personal experience with these lessons and his/her openness to learning them and acting upon them in his/her life.
Just like every other aspect of high school, and of life, the lessons set before us at North are what we make of them. Certain students, due to their own experiences, lives, and other conditions, already have an acceptance of alternative lifestyles and/or understand the severity of bullying. Others, for a variety of reasons, have not yet learned.
To prevent a tragedy like this from occurring again in our community, High School North needs to learn how to address these people who will not learn and find a way to show those people how important it is to act upon the lessons that our district tries so hard to teach.
Students need to know about the consequences their actions can have. Being told, “Don’t do that, because it’s bad,” will never fully imprint the lesson.
The best solution to prevent an event like this from occurring again is to have an assembly at High School North to show students what the consequences of their actions can be. The school is able to show us videos of what happens when you drink and drive; they need to tell us what happens when you post something online that you shouldn’t have posted or when you bully someone past their breaking point.
I strongly believe that an assembly such as this will make a large impact in students. Ideally, the school should arrange two assemblies: one for sophomores and one for seniors. The sophomore year assembly can refresh the lessons learned in middle school. Senior year, the lesson should change to fit the new life that the seniors will be entering shortly. This should be a lesson about respect for people outside of WW-P and how sentences much worse than detention punish our poor actions outside of high school.
It is very upsetting that an incident like this must occur before we can learn these lessons, but, perhaps, if solutions are found to effectively teach students the crucial life lessons of respect, acceptance, and tolerance, lives can be saved.
Editor’s note: At High School North Alana Jorgensen was involved in Fall Drama, Musical, Spring Track. and the Gay-Straight Alliance, in addition to working and volunteering outside of school. She is currently a freshman at Northeastern University in Boston, studying psychology.
